16 5 / 2012

       I’m sick of the sexualization of young girls. Really frickin’ sick of it. Do you know how messed up this is? How badly it is fucking with everyone’s heads? 
       My dad married someone 20 years younger than him. Why doesn’t this ever happen as often with older women and younger men? Hmmm? 
        Well, in my dad’s case: his first wife was sick of him, so he had to go and annoy someone else. No women his own age would put up with his shticks, so he had to go find a naive 30 year old. But guess what? My mom aged! My mom got older and realized what a prick my dad is. Why didn’t my mom go off and find a 30 year old man at 50? Because it’s not done. We have too much integrity. We have too much sense. We understand the concept of lived experience well enough, and we understand that no matter how “mature” someone is for their age, there’s always going to be a huge power imbalance with a big age gap. 
        I’ve had a few men significantly older than me show an interest in me. They were all really good guys. But, sorry, do you know how much that fucks with my head? Do you realize that I’ll never be able to relate to you as an equal, because you’ve already turned me into some dirty little teen p0rN* fantasy? And I fucking hate you for that. Not because I care now. Now I like it- it feels fun. But I’m not gonna like it, if God willing, if I live to be one of these “older women” you hear so much about. I don’t like spending my twenties avoiding my thirties. I don’t like that you make me want to die rather than age. It’s fucked up, okay? It just is. Seriously. Lolita. Woody Allen. There’s nothing glamorous about being a pedophile. If “age is just a number” then it shouldn’t bother you to date someone your own age or older. The little girls are just a temporary fix. You’ll still be damaged, and they’ll eventually grow up. Unless you find little girls forever.  
            I’m mad at these people today. Maybe tomorrow I’ll feel differently. But you can bet your ass that I’m not texting a 15 year old boy right now, and the thought of it doesn’t turn me on in the least. 

       I’m sick of the sexualization of young girls. Really frickin’ sick of it. Do you know how messed up this is? How badly it is fucking with everyone’s heads? 

       My dad married someone 20 years younger than him. Why doesn’t this ever happen as often with older women and younger men? Hmmm? 

        Well, in my dad’s case: his first wife was sick of him, so he had to go and annoy someone else. No women his own age would put up with his shticks, so he had to go find a naive 30 year old. But guess what? My mom aged! My mom got older and realized what a prick my dad is. Why didn’t my mom go off and find a 30 year old man at 50? Because it’s not done. We have too much integrity. We have too much sense. We understand the concept of lived experience well enough, and we understand that no matter how “mature” someone is for their age, there’s always going to be a huge power imbalance with a big age gap. 

        I’ve had a few men significantly older than me show an interest in me. They were all really good guys. But, sorry, do you know how much that fucks with my head? Do you realize that I’ll never be able to relate to you as an equal, because you’ve already turned me into some dirty little teen p0rN* fantasy? And I fucking hate you for that. Not because I care now. Now I like it- it feels fun. But I’m not gonna like it, if God willing, if I live to be one of these “older women” you hear so much about. I don’t like spending my twenties avoiding my thirties. I don’t like that you make me want to die rather than age. It’s fucked up, okay? It just is. Seriously. Lolita. Woody Allen. There’s nothing glamorous about being a pedophile. If “age is just a number” then it shouldn’t bother you to date someone your own age or older. The little girls are just a temporary fix. You’ll still be damaged, and they’ll eventually grow up. Unless you find little girls forever.  

            I’m mad at these people today. Maybe tomorrow I’ll feel differently. But you can bet your ass that I’m not texting a 15 year old boy right now, and the thought of it doesn’t turn me on in the least. 

  1. trueroo posted this